I haven't found mine. Well actually i thought i did but i guess i thought wrong. The truth is i'm sick of feeling unhappy and missing out on life because of one person who doesn't know, or probably won't care even if she does. But i'm not going to bring it up. One thing i'm proud of myself about is being able to suffer in silence. Not that i don't like confiding in anyone but seriously what's the use? As far as complaining goes, its not going to change anything.
Anyway 8 months is a long time to be hung up on someone. I don't mind being friends but a part of me will always regret liking you, for ruining what could have happened in those bloody 8 months. I've met people with potential to be girlfriends, not mindfuckers (no offense), actual girlfriends but i couldn't pay any attention to them. I miss the feeling of having one. Its been almost 2 years since my last actual relationship and i miss having that and you never gave it to me.
But honestly even talking to you doesn't make me feel the same as it used to. I used to be so excited to receive your texts and answer every single one but now i can't be bothered to. That's why i really really don't want to waste time anymore. I feel like there are many people out there who are worth more of my time. I dunno, maybe you'll never change or can't change and i feel quite bad for you more often than not. Anyway its good to know you're happy and STAY HAPPY. After all you put me through i think i'm too nice to you sometimes. But its okay, i forgive you for everything and i'll always be here if you need a retarded random friend :)
