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Good luck, she said
there's someone in this world for you
you keep telling them no but your heart says yes
Its one of those days again,
where you feel like ringing someone up but realise they wont be there for you anymore.
Cept, i dont really have to ring them up because i _______.
That was on impulse.
I didnt mean it.
I've to be careful what i say because there're people who're gonna come kill me. anytime, scary.
I spent one and a half hours jogging ard the estate.
Its nice jogging at night, when the whole road is yours and people cant see you.
Except for the cars. I mean they better see me, i dont wanna die. Not yet.
But the moment you see people its like 'uh, unglam', then you start walking.
Yup, thats me.
Explains why i hate morning run/pe.
My eyes were tearing when i ran though. Thought too much again.
Had the urge to go to the park and cry, but i spotted pl lites. And aunties. No big difference la.
Eesh.
Have i mentioned how much i hate seeing pl lites outside? Especially the kind tht throw your face, like today. Was on the verge of ramming my head into the wall and then i saw thelaughinghippo. Ah, god. If she sees this she's gonna squash me.
Anyway, the last thing i'd do is cry infront of pl lites anywhere in/out of school.
The next day when you get back, the whole school will know tht you cried.
And you'll wish you cld find those assholes who ratted on you but somehow you cant find them in school.
Why does this sound so familiar?
Oh, because it happened. Sec 2, hahah. I miss my sec two classmates):
Sec 2 clique, alyssa,ade,justina,joyce,j,cheryl,denise,serene,mu and of course nana and v, who never went to class with me but are still the best friends ever.
God, the only ones left in school are amu and i actually.
Yeah, if you didnt know i dropped to NA in sec 3. Ha ha, laugh all you want.
Not tht there's anything wrong with it. Except for the fact that i miss my friends.
So i didnt cry.
No disturbing aunties afterall.
I just walked with my head down ignoring everyone.
Not like they cld see anyway.
How could i have been so shallow all this while.
I realised i want nth more then how she used to treat me, and things like tht dont come twice.
Im scared to give anyone else a chance so much so,
you can put a gorgeous person infront of me and i still might not consider.
Call me a loser, call me whatever but its a fact.
Okay, people are seriously gonna come after me now.
Im not talking about the person, im talking bout the feelings.
I dont think i sound like myself when i blog.
I think i usually sound like a lifeless jerk.
Either tht or dont talk at all.
Lets see if i can break the record for crying in school again.
The last time was last year.
